As I left work yesterday I received call from an old friend who I had not spoken to in quite some time. As we began to talk, I stopped in the middle of it and smile, knowing that while I did not speak to this person in over 4 months – here we were having a conversation as if I had spoken to them yesterday. When I hung up, I got to wondering about friendships and how different friends fit into your life.
If you measure a “strong friendship” by how many times a week you call someone or how often you speak and/or see them, then I am by far the worst friend you will ever have. I have a tendency to not use my phone a lot nor do I “text”. Call me old fashioned but to me texting someone is not a way of communicating nor does is substitute a phone call or going out for a cup of coffee.
As the years pass and different people come into my life I have learned to separate where they come from and where they’ll fit. Some people you will know for a lifetime, while others will only come into your life for a given time and then leave. Some come with good intentions, while others are there to bring you down. I ask myself all the time – how does this person make me feel? Do they encourage me? Are they just here to talk about themselves and have they even heard a single word that I said? After speaking to them, do I feel better or worse?
I think about when I was younger and all the bullshit people use to bring around me and how sometimes I allowed myself to get involved into it. The same people, with the same story – all going about their lives so insignificantly. Same mindless chatter, same story, same script just different characters. While sometimes you cant change those around you, you can change those YOU’RE around. Now a few years older, I want to become someone who seeks more than the norm. I seek truth, respect, love, growth, and above all quality over quantity.
If someone where to write a book on my life, who would they choose to be those around me? Who will fit into my story? Who will shape the pages of my life? How will they fit into my life? In my final show when the curtains close and I am gone, who will mourn me? Who will even be there at all? And where will they sit in the audience during my final farewell show. Where will my friends now sit? Not everyone deserves front row seats.
As time passes and friends come and go -I have learned to choose my audience carefully.